Preacher Pete

by John Wyatt
copyright 2002


The crowd was large and noisy
in the Dry Gulch bar that day.
The dance girls, plump and lusty,
Each trying to earn her pay.

And as the slowly setting sun
Set the hills aflame,
The cowboys, lured lustily,
Entered this den of shame.

When out upon the prairie
They heard quite loud and clear
The sound of horses hoofbeats,
Coming ever near.

And as the stranger led his mount
And tied it to the rail,
The cowpokes eyed him warily
While sipping mugs of ale.

He stepped up to the boardwalk
And he swung the doors aside.
He sauntered to the bar rail
With a calm and easy stride.

He nodded to the barkeep
And he doffed that hat of his,
And heard one cowboy whisper:
"That's Preacher Pete that is!"

He struck the counter with his hand
And whirled to meet the crowd.
His eyes were filled with venom
For the girls so well endowed.

And as he took his coat off
And 'round the room did stride,
Not one in that establishment
Did not want to hide.

Then Preacher Pete did pull a gun:
A .45 by name,
And shouted to the people there:
"You all are filled with shame!

And those of you who will not
Hear the Word of God from me,
Are nothing but the Devil's spawn!
My gun shall speak to thee!"

The girls were cowed, the men did gasp,
As they listened to him preach,
For Pete could preach as no one could
When people he would teach.

The Bible held in his left hand,
His gun held in the right,
He strode about the room and preached
As filled with Godly Might.

And when a cowpoke tried to sneak
And scurry to the door,
Ol' Pete just raised his .45
And shot him to the floor.

Ol' Pete he preached a storm he did,
He preached and preached 'till dawn,
And shot another cowpoke dead
Who tried to sneak a yawn.

He shot one more for snickering,
And one who fell asleep.
And for the man who jumped ol' Pete,
His widow now will weep.

But Pete just kept on talking
For he really loved to preach,
But finally he did close his book
And finished up his speech.

The crowd was shuffling nervously,
Wondering what was next,
But Pete just put the gun away
And put away his text.

He donned his coat and tipped his hat
And sauntered to the door,
And then he whirled to face the crowd
And gave them one word more:

"When you are dead and gone to your
Reward that is so sweet,
You will praise the Will of God,
And the Grace of Preacher Pete!"